Truth Hurts

I’m caught in between my best friend and two other very good friends who are not in speaking terms right now.  It’s not easy to speak the truth, but someone has to say it.  The gap has widened and no one is taking the first step to bridge it.

Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything, but this has gone on for too long.  I feel for my best friend.  I can’t stand seeing her hurt and in the dark about what’s being said about her.

Now that the truth is out, all we can do is wait.  Whatever the reaction of the others may be, I think it’s still a win-win situation.  Because even if the truth hurts, it still sets everyone free – including those who don’t want to hear it.

Settling Down in Manila

It’s official – we are now Metro Manila residents.  After a year of planning and anticipation, we finally made the big move.  I found it easy to decide to leave my job and my friends, but it was very hard to leave the parents.  I worry for them, especially because they are both getting old and Nanay still has not regained her full functionality.

For the last two weeks, the kids and I have spent most of our days cooped up in the apartment. They stay in bed, play, or watch TV, while I do motherly stuff – i.e., cook, clean, wash clothes, fix the apartment.  Since I rarely got the chance to do these home economics activities while we were in Bacolod (thanks to our very capable helper), I’m actually enjoying this. 

I’m supposed to start work next week, but my contract hasn’t been finalized yet, so I’m given more time to spend with the kids.  No big deal.  I’m happy that I can still be here for them, if only for one more week.  Because the minute work starts, I know that my attention will be divided – into three!  That’s Dean, the kids, and work.  For now, I’m just enjoying being a mom and wife.  I’m happy to see my husband every day.  I’m happy that after a long day at work, he can come home to a hot meal and a family that he can enjoy eating the meal with.

Enzo asked me the other day, “Is our apartment a house or a home?”  I told him, a home is a place where everybody loves each other and where there is happiness.  No matter how small this space of ours may be, I still know that this is a home.

Mixed Signals

I don’t get it.  One minute everything seems to be falling into place, and then the next minute things are going out of whack.  What the..?

I’d like to think that the BIG decision I made this past year is in tune with what God actually wants for my life.  All of a sudden, it seems that I’ve been getting the wrong signals.  Or did I?

I just wish that things will fall into place.  Moving to a different place and transferring to a different job is not for the faint of heart.  I’m not scared of taking that leap of faith, but  I just wish things were clearer.

Can somebody just please tell me what God is up to?  Please.

separation anxiety

I find myself writing again, after a long time of being silent.  I need an outlet and what better way to release all my pent up emotions than to write?  I have this blog after all, and it is just here, gathering dust.  Nobody probably reads it anymore.  I am not as prolific as I used to be, thanks to my heavy workload.  Nonetheless, writing is cathartic, and so I blog.

*****

It hurts to be physically separated from the one I love.  I long to feel his arms around me, to have him hug me tight, and tell me sweet nothings.

I know that this separation is not going to last long, that soon, we will be together.  For now, I must endure.  I must feel the pain of not having him beside me.

I know that this is for our good, that I supported his career move because in the end, it will bring us closer to our dreams.  But for now, I must be patient.  I have to go about my daily activities, carrying them out as if I feel just bright and breezy.  I can’t be sulky and moody all the time because I have to think about my kids and about him, too.

I know that he, too, is feeling the pain of our separation.  Yet, I must be strong for him.  I must put on a brave face and tell him that things will be okay.  That we will have our chance to be together soon.

For now, we bear our burdens and wait.

I’m Back!

I haven’t blogged in WordPress for a loooong time.  In fact, I haven’t blogged at all.  I’ve been content to just go through my Facebook account, comment on some people’s posts, add pictures, and from time to time write something.  But as for blogging, haven’t really done it for more than a year.

Now that I have a faster Internet connection at home, I’m hoping I can update my blog more often.  I miss this.

You Gotta Read This!

I’m reading Malcolm Gladwell’s The Tipping Point right now.  It’s really a great book.  I think it’s even better than Blink, his other book which is also a number 1 international bestseller.

While Blink convinces us that “decisions made very quickly can be every bit as good as decisions made cautiously and deliberately,” The Tipping Point talks about how ideas, products, messages, and behaviors spread like viruses.  According to Gladwell, the Tipping Point is “the moment of critical mass,  the threshold, the boiling point.”  It’s the proverbial “straw that broke the camel’s back.”  It explains three rules of epidemics and talks about how sometimes big changes follow from small events, and that sometimes these changes can happen very quickly.

The book is only 259 pages long, but it’s packed with many interesting facts that blew me away!  Here are some of them:

1.  Suppose you are given a large piece of paper, and you’re asked to fold it once over, and then take the folded paper and fold it over again, and then again, and again, until you have refolded the original paper 50 times.  Do you know how tall the final stack would be?  Well, according to the book, the height of the stack would approximate the distance to the sun!  That’s the law of geometric progression working for you!

2.  We normally think that emotion goes inside-out, that is, our emotions are a reflection of our inner state.  But research shows the opposite could be true, too – emotions can go outside-in.  There are people who are very good in expressing emotions and feelings and they are far more emotionally contagious than others.  Psychologists call them senders, and aside from having special personalities, they are also physiologically different.  For example, the location of their facial muscles are different from those who are “less emotionally contagious.”  Just like in the spreading of a disease, there are carriers and there are people who are particularly susceptible to being affected with the carrier’s emotions.  (So this explains why some people can actually help cure a bad mood!)

3.  When Sesame Street was originally conceived, the Muppets were only filmed with other Muppets, and the street scenes were always filmed with real persons (adults and children).  But when researchers tested the show in the summer of 1969, they found out that children would give their full attention to the TV screens whenever the Muppets would appear but they would lose interest when the scenes would involve adults and children only.  Going against the advice of developmental psychologists not to mix reality and fantasy, they decided to put the Muppets together with the adults and kids on the street scenes – and that’s when Oscar the Grouch, Big Bird, and Mr. Snuffleupagus were born!

4.  Gladwell says that the success of Sesame Street can be attributed to the fact that the producers learned how to make television sticky.  Considering that the show has survived for the last 40 years, no children’s show could be stickier.  Right?  Wrong!  Research has found out that there is a children’s television show that’s even stickier than Sesame Street and that is Blues Clues!  If you want to find out why, go buy the book and read it!

Conference on Educational Measurement

As early as 2003, graduates of DLSU-Manila’s Institute for Educational Measurement, Evaluation, and Statistics (IEMES) have planned on formally putting up a professional organization for measurement experts.  But only after six years since the last batch (2002) graduated were we finally able to realize our goal.

This August 6-7, 2008, the First National Conference on Educational Measurement and Evaluation will be held at DLSU-College of St. Benilde Hotel, with the theme “Developing a Culture of Assessment in Learning Institutions.”  Truly, this is a momentous occasion for us graduates of the MS Educational Measurement and Evaluation program of DLSU and Center for Educational Measurement (CEM).  I think it is high time that we measurement experts be recognized in academic circles for our invaluable contributions to education.

This will be the first time I’m attending a national conference – and my first time also to present an original research work.  I not only look forward to the intellectual exchange that will surely take place, but I also am excited to see my classmates whom I have not seen for the past six years.  I look forward to reminiscing about our escapades during those 14 months we were together.  I look forward to renewing old friendships and to building networks with those who speak the language of measurement.

Typhoon Frank

We experienced one of the strongest typhoons yesterday.  Heavy rains coupled with howling winds drove us out of the house at around 11 am.  The rains started the night before and did not stop at all.  I was getting worried when I saw that the water almost reached our gate and the fish pond fronting the house was nearly overflowing.  When I found out that high tide would be at 12 noon, I made the decision to bring Nanay and the kids to my tito’s house, which is in the upper part of Bacolod. 

Maybe I was a bit paranoid, but I could still clearly see in my mind the flood waters which came into our living room last December 2006.  My first thought was of Nanay.  If the waters came into the house and we had to evacuate, how would we move her?  So then I decided that I’d rather be safe than sorry.  We spent the day at my tito’s house and although the waters did not go into the house, I still think it was a right decision because I was able to relax, knowing that Nanay and the kids were safe.

ABAKADA

Got this meme from Toni.  Here’s 26 things you probably didn’t know about me.

Accent:   Ilonggo gid ko ya!

Breakfast or no breakfast: Breakfast is the most important meal of the day.

Chore I don’t care for: Sweeping the floor!  My nose hates the dust.

Dog or Cat: Dog na lang

Essential Electronics: My laptop!

Favorite Cologne: Denenes

Gold or Silver: Silver is the new Gold!

Handbag I carry most often: Canvas Girbaud

Insomnia: Nope!  I’m off to dreamland once my head hit the pillow.

Job Title: Asst. Professor  (Yikes!)

Kids: Enzo, nearly 5; and Evie, 2 and a half

Living Arrangements: Living with my parents, Single parent during the weekdays, Happy housewife on weekends

Most Admirable Trait: You can count on me to get the job done.

Naughtiest Childhood Behavior: Very talkative in the classroom

Overnight hospital stays: When I gave birth to Evie.  Was admitted at 4am, gave birth at 930am, went home 12nn the next day.

Phobias: Slimy frogs…yuck!

Quote: “Anything that is worth doing is worth doing well…or not at all.”

Reason to smile: Enzo and Evie

Siblings: Ray Gerard and Karol Mae

Time I wake up: Usually 6:30 AM

Unusual Talent or Skill: I know what statistical tool to use by just reading the statement of the problem of a thesis or dissertation.  Can you count that as a skill?

Vegetable I Refuse to Eat: Radish… I just don’t like the smell.

Worst Habit: Procrastination!

X-rays: Essentially normal chest findings.

Yummy Stuff: UP Diliman Isaw, Cakes of Calea, Pistachio gelato

Zoo Animal I Like Most: White Peacock of Avilon Zoo

Disney the Babysitter

According to babycenter.com, the American Pediatric Association recommends that children under 2 years of age should not be watching ANY television, while children two years and older should watch no more than two hours of TV per day.

I hate to admit it, but my kids watch way too much TV, especially when I’m at work. I really feel guilty about this. When Enzo was still a baby, I told myself that I wouldn’t use the TV as a babysitter. Unfortunately, it’s easier said than done. I resort to TV whenever I have tasks to do that I need to concentrate on and I can’t have the kids interrupting me every minute or so. There are also a lot of times when I watch my favorite parental guidance shows (e.g. CSI, House, Heores) even with the kids around. I know, I know… I should be more responsible as a parent. And of course, hubby is not helping. After all, he’s the TV addict, not me!

I know my kids have been watching too much Disney channel because:

• They say “Aww, men!” when something goes wrong.
• They call the mice in your house “Mickey.”
• Whenever they see three interlocking circles, they shout out, “Hidden Mickey!”
• Their favorite song is “You are the Music in Me!”
• They think the world of Mr. Bean.
• Their magic word is not “please,” but “Miska, Muska, Mickey Mouse!”

It scares me that I’ve been too lax with them when it comes to watching TV. I’m thinking of removing the TV from the bedroom or even unsubscribing to cable altogether. But can we (hubby and I) deal with that???