I haven’t blogged since last week because I simply had no time to blog.  Last week I was busy processing my requirements for my new job.  I also had my hands full over the weekend – and until today – because Enzo still has no yaya.  It’s been almost two weeks since the yaya left, presumably to bring some money to her family.  She promised to return the next day, but until now there is no sign of her.  I’m pissed off like hell.  What makes me even more angry is that I let her bring home our extra cellphone so I could contact her.  I’ve been calling her since the weekend she left, but I keep on getting the “out of coverage” signal.  To make matters worse, Evie’s yaya is also planning to go home tomorrow because she says she has to take care of her father who is sick.  I don’t know if I can still take anymore of this.  I can’t afford to be absent from my new job!  I badly need helpers for my two kids by tomorrow!

To top it all off, my son needs to be enrolled in school by June but we don’t have enough to pay for his tuition.  Our monthly amortization for our lot is two weeks delayed.  And I still have to pay the helpers and Nay’s attendants.  Not to mention the many other bills waiting to be paid.  Aaarggghhh!

I don’t really want to tell the whole world about my problems, but I just can’t help but rant.  I know that life isn’t fair, that everybody has his/her share of problems, but things just suck in my life right now.  I know I have to face these problems squarely, but sometimes I just wish things were different.  I know there is no one to blame – not God, not me, not my mom – that’s just the way things are.  I know I have to learn to live with that.  I know I have to be an adult and just face up to whatever life throws me.  It’s just too damn hard to do that and I don’t know if I can take it anymore.